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Wednesday, 16 May 2012

THEY'RE MIIINNNEEEEE

OHMYGODEVERYONE guess what?!!?!?!?!?!  I ordered my fluevogs.  Yes, the DREAM ones!  Of course, I probably should have ordered the practical I can wear to work ones, but you know what?  I didn't, so fuck off.  I can be practical when I'm dead (that's how the saying goes right?).  So I have to say THANK YOU to my Fluevog Angel who made my dreams come true!  He bought me the "unicorn" if you will (well, I didn't even have the brains to come up with that one.....but when I was whining about accepting a gift as glorious as Fluevogs, some other poet came up with that terminology and I enjoyed it.....as in, those boots are like a unicorn, you'll never get them otherwise).  WHERE THE HECK WAS I....ooohhh right....my Fluevog Angel, or FA as I'm going to call it from now on cause I get distracted easily and every time I spell Angel I want to put Angle and then it makes me laugh really hard.....again, distractions....I think the fluevogs have gone to my head!! Okay so my FA (I promise I'll tell this story....for those sighing and rolling their eyes at this, I know who you are and have an extra special punch for you later!) started with me at Christmas time.....we were all over at my parents house and he randomly asked me "If you had $500 right now, and could buy anything but couldn't use it on bills, kids etc and I instantly said "FLUEVOGS!" and whipped out my handy dandy iphone to show him a picture of the ones I've been lusting over for the last few years...it may or may not have been my screen saver.  He insisted I needed to buy them....for me.....I should have them!  They were regularly $609 (GASP) but on sale for $299 (how could I afford NOT to buy them right??) and it was Christmas time...and I had no money for me....or $300 boots....that are impractical....but sooooooo amazingly hot.  So the months fly by....every occasion that pops up I joke with my husband "Boy, can't wait till I get that present of Fluevogs from you!" and my birthday rolled around "Gee, my birthday outfit sure is going to look good with those Fluevogs you bought me!" and of course....he hadn't.  And I knew he hadn't....and he knew I knew he hadn't...and he always looked sad and would say "if I could afford to have those for you right now, they'd be on your feet already" which, I knew.  I obsessively checked the Fluevog website every day multiple times to see if my size was sold out or not.....even went so far as to change my husbands screen saver and desktop on his laptop to pictures of fluevogs.....and always had the size I needed and the "checkout" page of the Fluevogs website open on the bottom tab of his computer.  OBSESS MUCH???  But I just wanted them sooooooo baaaaaaaaaaad!!!  And had totally resolved that I would never have them.  So whenever I'd see my FA he'd always ask "buy your boots yet??" and I'd say no....and on my birthday he asked what I wanted and said "I'll kick in $100 towards your boots!  You should have them!  You deserve them!  JUST BUY THEM!!!" and I laughed it off and told him when I saved up the other $300, I'd call him.  So Mothers day rolls around and my FA comes over for dinner.  He asks (as usual) if I'd gotten my boots yet....I say noooo.  He says "I'm going to buy them for you.  Let me buy them for you.  I've had a good run at work this week....they can't be more then what, 5 or 600?" and I get all embarrassed and flustered and mutter something and glaze over it.  Again he brings it up over dinner "go get your fluevog catalogue!  Let's order these!"  I'm practically droooooling and again say noooo it's too much.  He leaves and we exchange a couple texts back and forth;

"Think about it, you deserve them.  I think you do!!  Sleep on it a few days"
"Uggghhhh....it's like offereing crack to a junkie!! haha"
"Just say yes damn it"
"Don't be bossy!  That's my job!"
"K.  I still want you to think about it.  Let me know in a few days."

And that night I hardly slept.  I mean, how do you accept a gift like that???  I asked all my closest friends (okay 2 or 3 people, but I don't pay them much so they have to like me a little for real?) and was told JUST DO IT and at the same time Ohhh man, I couldn't do it.  I agonised over it.  I just wanted to say YES but....the cost....and do I really deserve them??  Free and clear?  Here, have a $400 gift, just cause.  I woke up the next day and learnt it was International Fluevog Day and thought it had to be a sign!!!!  So I did it. I ordered them.  My FA said to give him a total and he'd bring over a cheque that night....which he did....even including extra money claiming I'd need to buy something to wear with my new boots.  When I moaned about the price he said "I've picked up dinner tabs bigger then that" and looked at me like I was stunned.  So order is in, and they should be here in about two weeks!  Every day I want to run around and SCREAM like a 5 year old being chased by a bee.  OH and also....for International Fluevog day...if you tweeted or facebooked or whatnot about  the joyous occasion (how could you NOT!!) they would randomly select a few people to get a secret free gift with their purchase and they chose ME!!!!!  I mean, it could be a square of toilet paper for all I care, I'd be happy!!  My FA suggest an used sock or a reeeaaallllly long shoe horn, both I would enjoy!!!  And thank you to my FA and to everyone who listened to me moan and groan and whine about these fucking boots over the last year (or longer for some of you).  I tear up as I write this.....a little bit at the thought of all the amazing people in my life, but let's get real, mostly at the thought of my NEEEEEWWWWWW BOOOOOTTSSSSSSS! SQUUUUEEEE!!!!!

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